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Senior Year

Senior year is almost over! I can't even believe it! Nine more school days filled with projects, homework, dissections, and lots of planning! All of this means that although I do have new free periods (gymnastics is over for the year), I can't spend them sleeping or even chilling in the library. Unless "chilling" suddenly involves working on that never ending list of details. Most of these details seem to involve spending money that I don't want to spend. yeah. there's a reason money is the most popular graduation gift. the starving college student thing starts early. Oh well, it'll be worth it. Thanks to Justin, I'm not stressed out. During the preparations for Senior Recognition he taught me to just relax and focus on the big picture. Details are nice, but not worth stressing about most of the time. Although our class has been rather screwed over (thanks a lot class of 2010) we have managed to have a decent year. the school wide drama hasn't helped much though. Between the end of many old traditions, lots of new rules (Seniors 2010) and the dismissal of a dearly loved teacher and coach, it's been a rough one. I guess that just builds character though, right? Anyway, after a crazy weekend full of boiled frogs (they jumped into the hotsprings and died), dead snakes (near the hotspring), crazy adventures in the "wilderness" with Michelle, and an exhausting last gymnastics performance, I am back at school trying to deal with the mixed emotions of a quickly nearing graduation. Facebook is full of posts regarding various graduations. It's all rather overwhelming. My highschool years have flown by. Anyway, I'm off to grade a pile of papers and then attend to my seniorly duties. More blogs to come as I struggle to focus on the "to do" list.

wow...

So, I guess I kinda fail at this blogging thing... Life has been really crazy, I promise I wasn't just biting my nails or knitting sweaters out of belly button lint. ha. I'm a senior now, it's hard to believe, but true. I've got three student offices, two jobs, eight classes, a busy social life, and a very high stress level. Yesterday, I got a long email from my bestie that's gone off to college. It was very nice to hear of all her adventures, but it made me long for college. It's going to be fun. Now I just have to chose one. Oh yeah, and it would probably be a good idea to stop procrastinating all of the stuff on my to do list... After crossing off a few things already, I'm down to 12 things that must be done sometime today. ugh... Most need to be done in the next few hours because there is a guys basketball game tonight and I think the dorm will be closed. I need to do Jag Den stuff though, so even if the dorm were open, it probably wouldn't help me much.

As far as actual classwork goes, life is pretty good right now. I need to write a paper on the theology of marriage though, and that just seems so boring that I've been putting it off for weeks. ugh. In English IV we're reading Macbeth. I despise Lady Macbeth, and I'd like to have a little talk with Shakespeare. Did that man write any good stories? I seriously doubt it.

Thanksgiving break was amazing, I got to sleep a lot, and spend time with the family. The last morning I was home, we looked out and saw Smokey, one of our cats. It was super exciting because he hasn't been around in months! He's a little thin, but otherwise looks pretty good. No idea where he was all this time, but we're glad to have him back.

Senior Project is starting to growl at me again. As much as I love knitting, I hate having to do it. Maybe doing something I love for my project isn't such a great idea. The year is flying by and I still have so much to do! I'm thinking I'll talk to Jordan, the head of our new Snow Club, and see if we can do something together. Like have the knitting group make stuff for the boarders or something... I don't know, that's my newest idea.

Anyway, I'm off to try to shorten this ugly list of mine. Blogging helped clear my head, so maybe I'll start doing this again. haha. It might even be a good way to work on the journal I have to keep of my Senior Project... hmm...

Kaleb

This weekend my family and I were in Caldwell at my school for Camp Meeting. We had a wonderful time, but when we came home we were exhausted. Our day changed from happy to worried when mom was listening to all the messages we had received while we were gone. There were messages from my aunt and my grandpa saying that we needed to call one of them as soon as possible. Mom called Grandma and Grandpa but they didn't answer. A little while later she was checking her email and found an email from my uncle on the other side of the family. The email was a forward he had gotten from a co-worker telling the sad story of Gary and Wendy Roberts and the loss of their 4 year old son Kaleb. Wendy is my cousin, and Kaleb's death was the reason for all the messages. Over the nearly 24 hours since we got the news we have learned more about what happened but it's still kind of hard to believe. My cousins are in Chad and it always seemed kind of far away but not any farther than when I was little and Wendy lived across the country. Just since yesterday it seems to me that the world had at least doubled in size and that she is terribly far away. I only met Kaleb once at a family reunion but we would occasionally get emails with pictures and stories of him and his little sister Cherise. Last night Daddy showed me a verse that was special to him when he was in Africa in 1983.

And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or wife or children or lands, for My name’s sake, shall receive a hundredfold, and inherit eternal life.
Matthew 19:29

It's been a tough couple of days but it's comforting to know that there are great people with Wendy and her family and that God can and will bring good out of this.

Homeleave Sucks!

Well, it's finally homeleave again. I came home Wednesday, and I'm already wishing I was back at school. My best friend was going to come home with me, but she ended up going to the basketball tournament to help Stephenie take pictures for yearbook. I was a little sad, but whatever she wants is ok with me. Then Harry told me that "Casanova" our mutual best friend/my ex boyfriend has a new girlfriend and that she'll be at the wrestling meet I'm going to tonight. Great. I'm sure she's really nice and everything, but I still don't like it very much. Then last night Travis IM'd me saying that I was a horrible friend because our friend Suzie is cutting and I wasn't doing anything about it. Well, I didn't know until he told me. On top of all this, home doesn't feel like home anymore, the dorm is definitely home now. And my dog, Petie, has been really sick lately and yeterday the vet talked to a specialist and we put Petie down today. Mom and Dad are still gone taking care of that. So, I have a cold and feel miserable, my dog is dieing, my best friend has a new girlfriend and probably doesn't even remember me now, another best friend is cutting, and apparently I'm a horrible person. Yeah, homeleave is awesome. I can't wait to get back to school.

Dorm Stress

k, so everyone always says the 6 weeks after Christmas break are the most horrible

and I already agree

you know how I love to take care of everyone, and sometimes forget to take care of myself?

well... it's getting me in trouble again

everyone is stressed out about everything, not just finals, just... everything

so they all come to me

well, not all of them, but several of them

and we sit and talk and cry and i do everything i can to "fix" everything for them

well, eventually it all got to be too much

and i could barely act ok

but i somehow managed to fool most people

the exceptions were Marti, Suzie, and Travis

anyway, I talked to Travis some

and right before he left the dorm last night, he said i could call him if i needed to talk

well... you know how i feel about phones

but he called me, and we talked for probably an hour and a half

and i just sat on Marti's bed eating chocolate and crying and talking to Trav

eventually I had to go to worship

but that was ok, i guess

i thought a lot during worship, and i thought i had things figured out

but i was so exhausted that my the time i got back up stairs, I couldn't remember what I had thought of

or what i had figured out.

ugh. So, I got Marti to call Travis back after worship because I was starting to go crazy again. We talked and talked and talked, we actually ended up talking for another hour and 46 minutes. it was weird, but it helped a lot. I really don't know exactly what I was upset about, but I think I was just over loaded dealing with everything in my life, and everyonelse's.

Academy Life

Academy life is surprisingly different that it may seem. Life in the dorm is also unusual. Some people are really easy to get along with, and some just drive me (and everyone else) insane.

I always thought it was dumb that people were so mean to Freshman, but I'm starting to understand. I think that by their Freshman year guys should be old enough to understand and listen when they are told to back off, or not touch. Apparently not though. I guess it's not just the Freshman, but allot of the guys here. They just can't keep their hands to themselves and they never listen when we ask them to back up or give us some space. An interesting thing my friend Amanda and I have noticed is that when certain guys are around, or the deans or a teacher are close by, they are more likely to listen. I really don't think that asking them to give us some space and not touch us is asking too much.

It's just really frustrating. I talked to my friend Harry about it last night, and he suggested that I avoid hugging guys. I think that's a good idea, so I'll start working on that. I also talked to Suzie and she pointed out that if we ask them to leave us alone and they don't listen; it's sexual harassment. And she's right. So, Amanda, Suzie and I are going to work together more to make the guys back off. Yesterday in Algebra one of the Freshman was being really obnoxious, and not listening when we asked him to back off and not touch us, but he wouldn't listen until Amanda and I both glared at him and told him to sit down. Urgh, Ramon sent me an email yesterday saying that if I need him to murder anyone to call him and he'll even make sure they get extra time in purgatory. He also said he was just kidding, but I kinda like that idea.

This blog kinda makes Academy life sound horrible but it really isn't that bad, just rigt now I'm thinking more about a few of the negative things and looking for ways to resolve them.

Party!

so, while i was camping, my friend Harry (and his family) was on a rafting trip, now why anyone would want to do anything in freaking cold water on purpose and for more than one day, is completely beyond me. anyway, while he was gone, he had a birthday and now he's 16. i would know, he reminds me every day.... must be paybacks for always teasing him about being sooooo much younger than me. gosh, 7 months is like.... forever! right? haha. anyway, we had a surprise party for him last night. Sara and i spent like... hours and hours making a cake. it was chocolate with mocha frosting. mmhmm, sad thing was, i ate just enough frosting while i was making the cake, that i didn't want to eat any of it at the party. haha, i hear it was good though. i think i'll make another one for Gary's birthday in November... we're thinking we'll have an "over the hill" party for him 'cause he'll be 33. hehe. right now he's like exactly twice as old as me. something i plan on enjoying before i start catching up. anyway, it was cool, we ate hot dogs, drank pepsi and had cake and ice cream, then we all went over to the Patch gym and hung out there for a while. i really really suck at volleyball, and i'm not good at basketball either. then again, i really hate playing basketball with Jeremy 'cause he's 6'8 and really good at it. haha, oh well, i think we all had fun. the crying and hugging and saying our goodbyes and stuff to Sara and Megan afterwards wasn't that awesome though...

what's up with the "good" in goodbye?

I really can't think of anything good about goodbyes, any ideas? i just said goodbye to the best friend i've EVER had. and i have some pretty awesome friends. we had a surprise party for Harry tonight and most of the youth group made it, even Jessi and Jeremy who rarely come to our stuff, sadly Gary had to go backpacking, so he missed all the fun, and the crying and hugging afterward. Tuesday Sara and her family are flying away to wherever you fly to when you go to Egypt.

I was writing this blog last night, and my parents started yelling at me, so i had to get off the computer. about an hour later, Sara showed up and spent the night. but i'm still not getting along with anyone in my family. at all. ugh.

camping

so.... we went camping last week. with my mom's friend Elizabeth and her family; her husband Bryan is a good friend of my dad's and their 2 kids, Tiffany and Grant and my little sister and brother's best friends. so, that was interesting. they're kinda health freaks, so almost everything we ate was like... organic or something. i mean, the night we had spaghetti it was made with rice instead of wheat, it was good, but kinda weird. haha. umm, we went on a couple super long hikes, which was kinda cool, but i'm still tired from the whole adventure (or maybe i'm tired from staying up late with Sara every night since i got back? i think it's probably both). on the way back from our trip i read a book called "The Shack" it's beyond awesome, the creepy part is; a girl in the book is kidnapped (it's a true story) from a campground on the lake where we were camping. mmhmm, so like the whole story talks about stuff i had just seen. jeez, it was creepy. anyway, awesome book, read it if you can. kinda weird, but i really love that book. oh, Elizabeth's sister, Margie and her 2 kids were there too. i've known them for like... years, the kids are Maleah (9) and Darren (7). Margie had to go back to work, but wanted the kids to get to stay, so she payed me to help take care of the for the rest of the trip. that was... interesting, but pretty cool. oh, and there were a bunch of thunderstorms so the last night all the kids (except for my brother and me) went to the cabin Elizabeth's mom was staying in. chickens. haha, it was cool though 'cause then i got the whole tent to myself and got to sleep on 2 mats instead of just 1. haha. but, when i woke up in the morning i just sat there and enjoyed the storm until i felt something weird on my face, i thought it was just like the corner of the sleeping bag or something, but it was A SPIDER! so, i kinda scared it when i touched it, so it bit me, and that scared me, so i grabbed it and threw it. then i realized i should probably have looked at it and made sure it wasn't something terribly evil like a black widow or a brown recluse. but, i couldn't find it anywhere in the tent, and other than a purple-ish spot on my lip where it bit me, i seem to be ok. haha, anyway, it was a long long long interesting week, although rather boring and frustrating at times.

Life...

OK, so friday i got home froma long camping trip. i'll write a whole different post about that. anyway, i got home, and found a note on my desk from Sara! she was supposed to be gone for Cali, then go from there to Egypt, but apparently they didn't go. soooe the note said they were down at Patch, so I asked my parents if i could go look for them, and they said i could; after i unloaded the car, so i did that, then ran down there, and i've been hanging out with Sara ever since then. haha. friday night we slept in the gym at patch, which was interesting because 2 of the patch boys tried to run away. haha, Gary (our awesome YG leader) was looking for them and poked his head into the gym and kinda woke us up at 3AM hahaha. so, yesterday we hung out with our YG friends and we'll see them all tonight too. well... except Gary 'cause he's going backpacking. ditcher. oh well, it's for work so it's not exactly like he planned it. =( so, Sara had to run down to Patch to help her mom with something, but she'll be back soon and we're gonna watch a chick flick and make some sort of junk food. ya know, the more fattening the better it'll taste. haha. and i need junk food, i kinda had a major break down last night, haha. cried for like... hours and had a nice little fight with my mom. gosh, what a waste of time with Sara. oh well, she fixed it, but school hasn't even started yet and i'm already super stressed out about like... everything. ugh.

hair extensions suck!

so, today i did my normal church, potluck, hang with friends routine. but today it was a little different. a few weeks ago we started putting extensions in my neighbor, Clara's hair. it's a surprisingly big job. her hair is naturally almost shoulder length, and with the extensions it's past her waist and they take a freakin long time to braid. soo, we did that for a while (oh yeah, she's an adult, not a kid) and we've been putting this awesome blue color in some of the braids, it's kinda cool. well.... it would be if it didn't take so fricken long. anyway, after a while Mitch and Ryan (aka Moron and Retard) and Gary and his two sons came up and we ate dinner together and watched a video. it was pretty cool. so, now i'm just sitting here writing this and talking to Casanova and making mental lists of stuff i have to do before i go camping tomorrow.

Gosh, it's been forever!

Ok, sooo, it's been like FOREVER (and a day haha) since I've blogged. I quit blogging because I started going out with "Casanova" and we decided to kinda keep it a secret for about the first week, and I just couldn't blog and not say anything, so I quit, then got out of the habit. Sooo much has happened since then. Here are some of the things that have happened:

1. Driver's Ed (it was awesome)
2. Casanova and I started going out.
3. Summer!
4. 3 trips to Montana
5. getting to know some cousins I barely knew
6. my aunt died
7. Casanova and I broke up after 2 months and 14 days
8. Sara is gone to Michigan, then Egypt

Anyway, my life has been crazy busy, and I think it's been the best summer of my life, although some parts of it have been the worst summer of my life too. I dunno, life is interesting like that. I can't think of anything else at the moment, but I'll blog more and with more details later. I can't believe how much I've missed blogging, and now that I've signed in (for the first time in months) I think I will keep blogging, at least as much as I can.

Wow, I haven't blogged in eons. Life has been exciting, yet boring. I guess I just don't remember much of what happened this week. Tuesday my dad and sister flew to Seattle for a field trip. I can't even imagine how "fun" it would be to fly anywhere with 15 hyper 5th graders. Bleh. Oh well, they did get to go to the flight museum, which is soo not fair! Jeez, when I went to school we had field trips to the zoo and to a farm (the farm wasn't anything exciting). And we didn't even get to fly! Soo not fair! Haha. So, they were gone all day, and didn't get home until after midnight. Thankfully my mom decided that it was also the perfect day to go to Boise, so she and my brother were gone most of the day too. They didn't get home until about 1 A.M. So, I got the house to myself all day! It was very awesome! Of course being the brilliant person I am I stayed up and helped mom unload the car. So, I didn't get to bed until a little after 2! Now here's the super smart part, Harry and I had been talking earlier in the day, and decided to see if we could both get up at 6. So, I did. And he "forgot." Jeez. Anyway, I now know that three and a half hours isn't enough sleep. Haha. So, yesterday I was pretty tired, but right now I'm barely awake. Yesterday: I tried to stay awake, then mom told me to go take a ten minute nap. Sara woke me up when she got here after school, so then we headed down to Gary's. He was having a meeting with someone else though, so we had to sit and wait for a little while. Which was cool because we got to talk, but sitting in a darkish room wasn't the best way to stay alert. Haha, poor Gary was trying to talk to us and we could barely pay attention. Naturally when we went back to Gary's for youth group his plan was for us to play baseball. Oh well, it was fun, just hard to pay attention. Haha, and the best thing about youth group was that Casanova got to come! Sara sorta hates him though, so that wasn't so great, but she's just going to have to get used to him because he's definitely becoming part of our group of friends.

Best Day Ever!

OK, so, yesterday was totally, completely, unbelievably awesome! It started out a tiny bit different than my usual Saturday. I woke up at about 7:15. As usual. I heard dad out in the living room, so I didn't get up, 'cause I knew he'd come wake us up when we needed to get up. Naturally, he ad to work, so he left without waking us up. I rolled out of bed at 9. We have to be at church at 9:45. Blah. I love church, but I hate being in a hurry like that. So, since my sister was in the shower, I checked my myspace, and had a note from Casanova. So, I talked to him a little, then went to church and potluck just like I do every week. During potluck those of us under 20 started scheming. As usual. We ended up arranging a hike up a trail we call Grandma's Death. Because it's so steep and tough that it would kill a grandma. Mitch and Ryan named it. Anyway, Harry got Casanova to come, so I was pretty excited. SO, we came home and changed, then went to Mitch and Ryan's to meet the group. After everyone finally got there we headed out. But the adults made us come back and listen to them tell us all these rules, and tell us what time we had to be back. 20 minutes later we finally hit the trail. Mitch and Ryan's sister (well, not really sister, but like sister, it's complicated) , Julie, is 19, so the adults decided she was in charge. Which would have been ok, but she is slower than the rest of us, and she made us stay in sight. Blah. Naturally Harry and I were trying to get away from his brother Wyatt, and Mitch and Ryan. So, Casanova was too. Poor Sara wasn't feeling very good, and she can't stand Casanova, so that made everything rather interesting. It would have been even more awesome if 4 certain people weren't there. Oh well. I had a fantastic time anyway, and Harry and Casanova say they did too. That hike was rough. A few times the guys decided we were going to stop and take a break. I was determined enough to keep up with them that I probably would have made it even if they hadn't stopped. But I was very glad they did. Haha, Casanova kept stopping and trying to get Sara to let him carry her. But, she's too stubborn, so then he'd try to convince me, and I'm just as stubborn. Poor guy can't stand to see us getting tired. We did finally make it up to the water fall, which is kinda wimpy, but it's still cool. I'll take a camera next time. I think I'm the only one that had ever been there before, maybe Mitch and Ryan, but I don't think so. So, we hung out there for a while, then headed on up the trail. Casanova, Harry, and I wanted to see if we could summit, but there were too many wimps along, and we did have to be back by 7:30. So, eventually Julie made us turn around. Running down a mountain is a lot more fun than climbing up it. When we were almost back we did manage to get permission to ditch the group, so we kinda wandered back. Haha. Then when we were where we could see the house, and the rest of the group playing catch, we stopped and hung out for a little bit. Then the guys had a dirt clod war. It was hilarious! I should have joined them, but I was a little too tired. I think the only really cool thins we found were a wild turkey, and Yellowbells. Yellowbells (can't find them on any flower web sites, but that's what Casanova called them, so I'll keep trying to identify them and find out other names for them) are these awesome flowers that Casanova showed to us. I love them! We found a few that had been stepped on (by Mitch, Ryan, and Wyatt) so Casanova picked them and gave them to me. I carried them around for a while, then put them in my pocket and forgot about them. Haha. Oh well, I remembered when I got home, and they're now in the flower press. Anyway, I'm still tired from all that excitement. Smart me got bored sitting around at Mitch and Ryan's, so I convinced Harry and Casanova to go on another walk. Haha. And I worked out on Friday, so I'm sore from that too. hahaha. Good think I like being sore. Otherwise this would suck. Good thing wrestling season is over too, I wouldn't want Casanova to be sore if he had to wrestle. Haha.

Relief

Last night wasn't as bad as I thought it might be. All I had to do was sign some stuff, and stand around while mom filled out all kinds of paper work. Blah. Now we just have to go to the court house and sign something else. The, on the 12th I have to start being at the school at 7:30 every weekday morning. Blah. Anyway, yesterday was my sister's birthday. She's now 12. Jeez, I'm ancient. I remember when she was born. Well, and stuff before that. But the combination of realizing how old she is, and starting drivers ed is making me realize how close I am to grown up. It's scary. I guess there are other things in my life that also make me realize my age. One of my friends is pregnant, yeah, she's only 17, but the fact that it's possible for one of my friends to be pregnant is just mind boggling. Life is so confusing sometimes. Good thing I have Casanova and Sara to talk it all over with. They are immensely helpful. I love them!

Drivers Ed

sign up night is tonight. And I'm stressed out. Shouldn't be, but I am. Jeez, why do things like this have to be so scary? I know the teacher, he's awesome! He's my little sisters teacher right now, and he'll be my teacher all summer. I guess just hanging out with new people, and knowing that I'll be spending a lot of time with them weather I like them or not is just a little scary. Seriously, what if they all hate me? I happen to know that one of them does NOT like me at all. Make that two. Ryan is taking drivers ed too. So, this could be interesting. I'm planning on just hanging out with the two guys that are going to be in the same car as me. I don't really know them, but I know who they are. Charlie is Casanova's other best friend. Tyler is just a guy I've seen around town and talked to a few times. Scary. Ugh, I finally settle into a schedule, and then school's over and everything changes. Isn't life just sooo much fun. Haha, actually, you all know that I love life, it's just a little frustrating sometimes.

Life

is amazing. It sucks, then it's awesome, then it sucks again. Blah. Oh well. The concert was awesome! Terresa (leader of our bell choir) came with us. So, I sat with her, then Harry and Casanova came and sat with us. Eventually mom and dad got there, and they sat with us too. So, we sat around and talked. Yes, during the concert. Although we did try to keep it quiet, and we did listen. Some. Haha. Seriously, I bet none of you could hang out with those guys quietly. haha. Of course I'm not a very quiet person either. So, that was awesome. Tuesday was just a normal day at home. Boring. Wednesday was exciting as always. Sara came over after school, and we headed down to Gary's office. Hung out with him for a while, then came home. Sara practiced flute then went to her lesson next door. After her lesson we always go to Youth Group, but she'd decided to go to her little sister's softball game instead. Ditcher. That's two weeks in a row! Oh well, I didn't mind too much because Casanova was coming! YAY! Haha. No matter what Sara and Harry say, I am NOT obsessed with him, I just think he's awesome. So ha. So, dad took us to Mitch and Ryan's for youth group. It's at their house every other week, the other weeks it's at Gary's. Casanova and Harry were already there, so we sat around talking for awhile. Then Sara showed up! I don't know why, but she changed her mind! YAY! So, I got to hang out with Casanova and Harry twice this week! Funny thing is, when I got home from youth group I got on the computer to do homework, and ended up talking to Harry and Casanova. Haha. I think even if we talked all the time we would still think we didn't talk enough. Haha. Gotta love friends like that.

Concerts and Choirs

Today has been kind of a slow day. I slept in a little, then got up and ate breakfast. Then I decided to take a shower, got in the shower and waited for the water to warm up, I waited. And waited. And waited some more. I was about to go ask mom if she was doing laundry or running the dishwasher or something when she knocked on the door and told me that she had started running a bath earlier, and had just discovered that she had completely forgotten and had left the water running for like an hour. Haha. At least the tub didn't overflow. About 4 more inches and it would have. So, I had to wait for another hour for the water heater to heat up more water. So, then just the normal school work and family stuff I usually do. Until 5:30, then I have to go to bell choir (choir chimes really) then from there straight to the public school for my sister's concert. Things are still slow but they should speed up to a crazy pace any minute. Savanna just got home from school, so I won't be bored for long.

Gracie

OK, turns out Gracie isn't allowed to have a blog at all anymore. Sad, but I'm sure her parents are just doing what they think is best. You have to give them credit for that. So, we'll miss her, but I'll give you updates on her occasionally so you all know she's still alive and well.